Today I saw a preview for a new movie coming out that I really want to see. I don’t remember the name of it, but the gist of the movie seems to be about a young couple falling in love and then the girlfriend overstays her visa and is deported back to her home country. They are both heartbroken and the movie is obviously going to be a tear-jerker that details their attempts to be together.

Ironically enough a friend of mine just went through a similar experience when his girlfriend was suddenly deported back to Vietnam. He did not know she was in Australia illegally and they were only given one week to sort things out. It was clearly an emotionally charged experience for them both where love and panic collide.

This got me thinking about what a person might do if their significant other was actually deported. Being an immigrant myself and after hearing so many stories like this, I started to think of ways I, or anyone else, might deal with this situation…

First establish if your feelings are serious enough for each other that you want to be united again, no matter what it takes. This is an important first step, because fighting a deportation can be a long and exhausting process.

Consult an immigration lawyer and ask them to review the case to see if there is a way to reverse the deportation. This will take time, money, paperwork, and a lot of patience. If it can be reversed, be prepared to wait even longer as the process surely will not go by swiftly.

If you love each other enough to fight the deportation, perhaps you love each other enough to consider getting married? By no means should you get married just to prevent the deportation. But if you really love each other and want to spend your lives together then it might be something to think about. If so, find out if marriage will change your boyfriend’s status and allow him to return to your country. Often-times it does, but your relationship will be investigated by the immigration bureau for legitimacy.

While you are fighting the deportation and considering your options, make sure you maintain the closeness of your relationship. Do not let every conversation you have be about the legal process. Try to stay positive. If it is an option, visit your boy/girlfriend when you can to help ease some of the heartache of being separated.

Remember to call each other, text, write letters, send emails, chat online, etc. as much as possible. This is another way to keep the intimacy alive in your relationship while you are apart, and it will help provide more proof that your relationship is real to the immigration authorities should you attempt to get married.

If the deportation cannot be reversed and getting married will not allow your significant other back into your country, perhaps you should consider moving to their country. If you are really in love and want to be together, it could ultimately be a grand adventure and the experience of a lifetime. However, make sure you go through the proper legal channels so you don’t end up facing deportation yourself at a later date.